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On Being Alone

I have always preferred to be alone. Ever since I was quite small. For decades I honestly thought there was something seriously wrong with me. But with the time that I now have since retirement, along with the vast amount of information out there on the internet, I have come to some startling insights about myself and why the things that have caused me huge amounts of anxiety throughout my entire life, do just that.


This particular article came up on my MSN Feed today. It resonated with me and I want to share it with you. Perhaps you also feel this way, and this might help you understand yourself a little better. Or, perhaps after reading this, you might understand the "weird" behavior of someone you know and love...


18 Reasons Clever People Prefer to Be Alone

Studies have proven that clever people are more likely to enjoy solitude than spending time with others. Whether due to their sensitivity to external stimuli, their high levels of independence, or any other one of the 18 reasons we’ve listed here, it certainly seems to be true. Read on to discover if any of these things resonate with you!


-They Value Deep, Meaningful Connections Over Small Talk

Intelligent people often crave substantial conversations about complex topics. They may find small talk unfulfilling and prefer thought-provoking discussions, and they tend to value friendships that offer intellectual stimulation and understanding. Both of these things can be hard to come by these days, which is why they may simply prefer their own company.

-They Have Vibrant Inner Lives

Some clever people possess active imaginations and a bustling internal world. They find satisfaction in their thoughts and ideas and enjoy exploring their inner universe. As shared by Choosing Therapy, “When you engage with other people, you need to make compromises with how you spend your time to incorporate the other person’s needs.” When you’re alone, however, you have the freedom to do as you like.

-They Are Highly Sensitive to External Stimuli

Clever people are highly observant and sensitive to their surroundings. They may also get easily overwhelmed by crowded, noisy environments. Solitude, on the other hand, provides a break from this sensory overload and can bring people some much-needed peace.

-They Desire Continuous Learning and Personal Projects

Smart people are often lifelong learners, always seeking new knowledge. Some might be passionate about engaging in personal projects that require focus and solitude or are extremely focused on their career goals. These types of people enjoy growing and creating in their own space and don’t have time for distractions.

-They Don’t Need as Much Validation From Others

While some people feel the need to be around others for validation, clever people are often confident in their abilities and decisions. These people tend to seek approval from a select few rather than a larger group, and they are more focused on self-acceptance than societal acceptance.

-They Experience Higher Levels of Anxiety

Intelligence can be accompanied by increased anxiety. Why? Because overthinking and self-awareness contribute to stress. According to Hack Spirit, “intelligent people could perhaps crave more alone time in order to remove themselves from the stressors of modern living.” They may prefer solitude to manage and reduce their anxiety.

-Others May Slow Them Down

It’s not just about spending time with others socially; clever individuals often prefer to work alone too. For super smart people, working with others can be hindered due to differing intellectual levels. They may prefer to work alone for efficiency and focus and can feel frustrated or impatient in group settings.

-They Don’t Always Fit In

Smart people often feel like outsiders due to their unique perspectives and can find it challenging to connect with mainstream interests. It’s not uncommon for these individuals to prefer solitude over feeling misunderstood or like they don’t belong in certain social settings.

-They Are Ambitious and Goal-Oriented

Everyone has their ambitions and goals in life, but extremely clever people tend to be more driven by their personal goals and achievements—to the point they view these as more important than social situations. They may enjoy working toward their ambitions without distractions. Solitude, after all, provides the space to focus on personal aspirations.

-They Need Time to Recharge

Psych Central says that a “lack of time alone can leave some feeling irritable, stressed, or angry.” Clever individuals in particular require solitude to rejuvenate and adequately process their thoughts. They may feel drained after social interactions and need alone time to regain their mental clarity and energy.

-They Don’t Get Bored Easily

Most people seek the company of others to entertain themselves, but very clever people are often engaged by their own thoughts and ideas. They’re able to find creativity and stimulation in solitude and are constantly thinking, pondering, and creating.

-They Are Highly Independent

Some people simply prefer making decisions and following the paths that they choose without outside influence. New Trader U says, “Free from distraction, solitude allows them to explore possibilities independently, discover new insights, and exercise their free will with no one looking over their shoulder.” These people are natural leaders and are not easily swayed by others.

-They Care More About Quality Over Quantity

It’s not that clever people like to be alone 100% of the time, but they do tend to prefer quality over quantity in their relationships, meaning they may enjoy spending time with a select few people over big social gatherings. These people value meaningful interactions and genuine bonds and avoid superficial relationships.

-They Don’t Feel Like They’re Missing Out

As defined by Verywell Mind, “the fear of missing out, or FOMO, refers to the feeling or perception that others are having more fun, living better lives, or experiencing better things than you are.” Extremely smart people, however, do not have this fear. They are content with their own company and activities, focusing on the present and their personal fulfillment.

-They View Things From Different Perspectives

Intelligent individuals often spend considerable time in solitude, fostering an ability to view the world from various angles. This continuous learning and exploration enables them to understand complex concepts and ideas, contributing to their unique insights. Solitude then acts as a catalyst.

-They Are More Creative While Alone

Clever people use their alone time for thinking, learning, and creating. This independence fosters unique and innovative ideas. Being in this environment, free from external influences, allows them to think outside the box and develop creative solutions.

-They Are Less Inclined to Follow Social Norms

While most people go along with what others want, clever people question and challenge societal expectations. They’re not people pleasers and instead are comfortable with their unique perspectives. These individuals much prefer authenticity over conforming to social norms.

-They Are Emotionally Self-Sufficient

As shared by Medium, “Intelligent people tend to be more self-sufficient and independent, which means they are less reliant on social interactions for validation or support.” These people are capable of finding internal sources of happiness and fulfillment and do not rely heavily on others for emotional support.


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